My first attempt at blogging

Hi there friends. This is my first attempt at starting a blog so take this with a grain of salt.

 

This has been a particularly hard week for me. It’s currently Tuesday at 1:20 am. As I was lying wide awake in bed a few moments ago, I couldn’t think about how big of an impact my mental illness has on my life as a medical student and how nobody talks about it. So I decided to share my inner thoughts and hopefully help out a fellow student also struggling with this issue. Sure our school has resources to help with “wellness” and “burnout.” I think it is great that these resources are available but lets be honest, they’re not always helpful even though they are wellmeaning. I started seeing a psychiatrist offered through my program about a year ago, and although Im working on my mental health and have taken steps to improve it, this is not an easy or linear process and I still struggle. Sometimes more than others. This is one of those times. I went to bed around 10pm Sunday night, purposely didnt plug in my phone so it would die. Then I slept in till 5pm monday. I missed class and am now behind on studying. Now im wide awake and anxious at 1 am.  Now this doesn’t happen every week and my struggles with my mental health are so easy to hide. If you asked my friends or classmates if I struggle with mental illness, the majority of them would tell you they never thought of it. Like most of you I am on top of things. I have positions on the eboard of several school organizations. I am involved in service, I’m on top of the material and am usually well prepared for class. Im high functioning and a pro at making my life seem perfectly in order, until Im not. Anyways this is how this blog came about. Im hoping by sharing my experience I will be able to help others and bring more awareness of what it is like to be a medical student while struggling with a mental illness. None of us are perfect, all I can do is try again tomorrow. Goodnight and welcome to my blog!